Mar 28

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The Gateway Of India

A for Aamchi Mumbai. A city that never sleeps. A city that has grown from Bombay to Mumbai, the financial capital of india not only is the fastest but also the city of dreams. The land of Bollywood (Indian cinema). Aamchi Mumbai translates to ‘Our Mumbai’,

B for Butter Chicken. Chicken made in the most sinful gravy and dollops and dollops of butter. This is the staple food in north india and perhaps my favorite. You can google this to know more.

C for Cricket. The game, gifted to us by the English. We thanked them by giving it to them with a Tendulkar.

D for Democracy. The largest in the world. And inspite of all the fall backs, we have continued to grow as a strong nation.

E for Elephant. Its huge, its bulky and its powerful. It might be slow, but the slow one wins the race in the long run. Thats what Indians are about.

F for Freedom. Indians have the freedom which no other person enjoys anywhere in the world. Right to freedom, equality and speech are part and parcel of every Indian.

G for Ganges. The Ganges, is the river of India, which has held India’s heart captive and drawn uncounted millions to her banks since the dawn of history. The story of the Ganges, from her source to the sea, from old times to new, is the story of India’s civilization and culture, of the rise and fall of empires, of great and proud cities, of adventures of man… (from Discovery of India, Nehru)

H for Hinglish. Thats the way Indians speak english. ‘You want me to be doing a further discourse on the same subject? If yes, please enter my shop from the backside only’

I for Independence Day. The day, 15th August 1947 is one we cherish and is close to our hearts. Even now, I look at the speech by the Prime Minister at the Red Fort on this day and marvel at the parades. Its the day we pushed away the foreign forces and proclaimed our true identity. That of an Indian.

J for ‘Jashn’. Translates to celebration. Indians celebrate all occasions, small or big. At times we don’t even need a reason. Just happens. A few people, some beer and chicken and we are ready to go!

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K for Kama Sutra. The way its done. Period.

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L for Lungi. The traditional attire of Indian men. Its basically a piece of cloth you tie around your waist and pray it does not fall!

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M for movies. Bollywood, Tollywood and all the woods. The most number of movies any country makes.

N for Nose Digging. Well, we have this thing for nose digging. We do it all the time, anywhere! We just need something to wipe it off, and if that is not available, watch out when someone just bumps into you. He might have just passed on the snot!

O for Optimists. Indians have been perpetual optimists. With a spirit of a billion people, who can ever keep it in check? It takes a lot to keep us quirks in check. And come what may, we always hope for the best, even when we vote the crook into power!

P for Politicians. From sporting the Nehru cap to the dashing Raymond suit, they have come a long way. And with the scene hotting up with more youngsters, the political arena is set for a major change. Often accused of being power hungry and corrupt, the good ones have managed to keep India going.

Q for Quintessential. :D We wish to be!

R for Religion. The soul of every Indian. There are more religions and sects than any other country in the world. India is secure in true meaning. Unfortunate events, are never triggered by the people but only vested interests.

S for Sanskriti. Sanskriti translates to culture. The Indian culture is ancient and has stood the test of time. Assimilating various cultures as they come. It is also derived from ‘Sanskrit’ an Indian language.

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T for Twenty20 WorldCup Win. A moment we will all cherish, when India won the first ever shortest version of the game. Was one of the most deserved wins ever!

U for Utopia. An ideally perfect place, especially in its social, political, and moral aspects. In other words, an impossible place. But we are getting there!

V for Victory against Pakistan in 1971. I have nothing against them, just that we kicked some sorry ass!

W for ‘Want to make friendship?’. The call of the despos! Have many of those have you got till now? Only seen in India!

X for XXL. The size of the average Indian Male or Female after the age of 50. The size applies everywhere, and you know what I mean!

Y for Yeda. A word with origins in Mumbai. It is very close to calling someone a dork, buttface or an asshole.

Z for Ziddi. Ziddi means persuasive, bratty and one who would always want things his/her way. That’s just a small bit of who we are!

There are of course a lot that I would have missed out on, You are free to add them here!

Tags: Prateek, Simon

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Jan 29

Its time to choose our final destinations to work. I say Hyderabad. Why?

  • I am bored of Bangalore
  • Its the best place for chicken biryani
  • Good mutton
  • Cheap houses
  • A place called ‘Bawarchi’

End of assignment. Now discuss.

Feeling Luckier?

Jan 29

I was eating some chicken biryani in the afternoon today. My friend told me that the population of chicken is more than of humans! I mean really??? I was checking the internet for right stats because i refused to believe it. All my hard work had actually gone waste!

These are the dismal figures guys: The population in 2003 was 24 billion (4 chickens for every human being), according to the Firefly Encyclopedia of Birds. (wikipedia)

what in the world have we been doing so far?? I have been eating chicken after chicken for so many years! and I see this kind of a statistic. It pisses me off!

We need to form a world committee on reducing the chicken population. All those in favour say ‘Cluck Cluck’.

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Jan 23

I am pretty honest. I have no clue how it happened. I think i might have got away with stuff like this.
How Miracles work

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